Burgos

🙋 1.1 PERSONAL DESCRIPTION

            In life, we always find ourselves at a crossroads of choices. However at the end of the day it is still important to choose yourself. Hi, I am Jonina Ria B. Burgos, a second-year BS Pharmacy student at the University of San Carlos, but, due to the pandemic, I am still stuck here in my hometown, Tacloban City Leyte. In terms of attitude and outlook in life, I can confidently say that I am an empowered woman who is independent and, at the same time, can be dependable. I learned to rely on myself as a result of certain hardships I faced since I was a child when my parents separated, my siblings moved out of the house, and I was basically left alone since both of my parents were constantly moving from one area to another most of the time. I am my friend, supporter, cheerer, and a shoulder to lean on. Since I am always alone, my journal full of plans, insights, and frustrations is my only emotional outlet whenever I feel extremely happy or sad. My journal knows almost all of me compared to my family. I have always lived by the saying, “it takes nothing to join the crowd. It takes everything to stand alone”. I think being able to do things alone is something I can be proud of since not everyone can do so. However, I am also a firm believer that “no man is an island.”

📔 1.2 AXIOMS OF COMMUNICATION

Four Sisters and a Wedding

      The story of the movie “Four Sisters and a Wedding” revolves around the four Salazar sisters (Teddie, Bobbie, Alex, and Gabbie) attempting to stop the wedding of their younger brother (CJ). Aside from this issue, they also have insecurities among one another that were revealed along the process of stopping and preparing for the wedding. One of the famous scenes from the movie was when Bobbie told her mother (Grace) that her favorite children were Teddie and CJ and she felt less loved among her siblings. Although the issue of favoritism was only explicitly revealed by Bobbie at the near end of the movie, there were some scenes that supported Bobbie’s claim. Those scenes would be discussed and analyzed below using an axiom of communication. The dominant axiom of communication observed in the movie is the first axiom, which states that one cannot not communicate. These are some of the following scenes in the movie where the first axiom is evident: 

Bobbie and Teddie’s Arrival at Their House 

        The first one to arrive at the Salazar’s house was Bobbie. Rushing out of the house to see who had arrived, Gabbie and their mother, Grace, saw Tristan, a handsome and neat guy. Right away, Grace praises Teddie for having a really good taste in men, although she hasn’t confirmed yet if it was Teddie or Bobbie who arrived and whose boyfriend Tristan is. She was then corrected by Gabbie that Tristan is Bobbie’s boyfriend. That scene showed that Teddie is first in her mother’s mind. Although she didn’t verbally express it, the act of concluding that it was Teddie who arrived communicates that Teddie was really at the front of her mind and that she was really excited to see Teddie. Moving on to the next scene, Gabbie and Grace went outside of the gate to see Bobbie. Grace and Bobbie haven’t caught up yet, but when Teddie arrived, Grace quickly rushed with her arms open wide, ready to hug Teddie. Grace was all smiles to see Teddie, while Bobbie was left behind with Gabbie and their housemaid. After getting out of the taxi, Bobbie stares at how her mom welcomed Teddie. In this scene, the action of Grace somehow makes Bobbie sad because the intensity of happiness when Grace saw Teddie was different when she saw Bobbie. It seemed like she was happier the moment she saw Teddie. 

Grace Scolding Three of her Daughters Except for Teddie 

        The Salazar sisters (Teddie, Bobbie, Alex, and Gabbie) were enraged and frustrated when they returned home after meeting with the Bayag Family to discuss the plans for CJ and Princess' wedding. They were offended that the Bayag Family had indirectly belittled them by allowing CJ to sign a prenuptial agreement. Although all of the daughters were rude during the family dinner, only Gabbie, Bobbie, and Alex received a reprimand from their mother (Grace). She even emphasized Bobbie and Alex’s behavior as if they were the only ones who acted rudely. This action of Grace implies that Teddie is indeed her favorite child, even without verbally declaring it. Moreover, Bobbie too was hurt when her mother pointed out and emphasized her behavior but not Teddie’s. She communicated her emotions just by having a look of shock, disbelief, and by sighing loudly.

Analysis by: Abugan, Queenie C. & Burgos, Jonina Ria B.

💑 1.3 RELATIONAL COMMUNICATION THEORY

🔊 1.4 COMMUNICATION STYLE

1. My predominant communication style is: 

    👉Based on what I've read from this module, I think my predominant communication style is passive-aggressive. 

2. The people with whom I most often use this style are: 

    👉I only leave the house on special occasions or when a friend invites me out, but I spend most of my time at home with my mother and older brother. When I'm experiencing strong emotions like anger or grief, I tend to notice this type of communication style. I indirectly express myself, may it be by closing the door loudly, stomping my feet, or washing the dishes aggressively to the point where they notice the sound of the plates. Whenever they talk to me, addressing my behavior, I respond in two ways depending on my mood, such as (1) responding sarcastically or (2) being silent until they notice that they were the reason why I act like that. 

3. Level of effectiveness and how it affects me:

    👉Honestly, I don’t know how I even have this kind of communication style, and I think this does not support communication because it doesn’t involve any understanding, but more on expressing my emotions whether the people around me understand or not. As a result, I am often labeled as disrespectful or a brat, which hurts me. That is why, when I am not with my family, I pretend to be someone else to avoid being identified as such by others. Moreover, I tend to be indecisive and think that the decisions I make are always wrong, hence, I always agree to do the things that people around me want to do. Like now, I am taking up BS Pharmacy even though Architecture was my first choice, and I think because of that, I got more lost on what kind of life I’m living if I don’t decide for myself and fight for what I want.

🔊1.5 COMMUNICATION AND RELATIONSHIP BUILDING IN PUBLIC CONTEXTS

Can Teachers and Students be Friends?

    👉In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with building friendship between a teacher and a student since having to build relationships and a connection to students can make teaching more engaging and captivating. With this, it is easier for the teacher to understand their students. However, there should be a line that both sides should never cross and should still maintain the proper student and teacher relationship and also have to respect each other and don’t violate each other’s space.

Bettering Communication in a Workplace

🏕 1.6 COMMUNICATION IN MEDIATED-COMMUNICATION

💏 1.7 TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS

Pets are Family: An Analytical Essay on Pet Relationships

by: Jonina Ria B. Burgos

            In life, we constantly want love and attention, whether it comes from other people or ourselves since love and relationships are things that we need. According to research, when we are in love, it causes our body to release feel-good hormones and neurochemicals that can trigger specific positive reactions (The Economic Times, 2014). However, we do not only desire love and attention from humans, but animals too can give the same type of love that all of us deserve. Hence, to prove this, I interviewed my brother, Pablo B. Burgos IV, a pet owner for more than five years. He is a 22-year old mechanical engineering student from Don Bosco Technical College Cebu currently residing in Tacloban City, Leyte. He was the one who introduced me to taking care of pets when he brought a dog to our house when I was nine years old. The dog was a 4-month old Aspin puppy. He named her Yami. Unfortunately, after a few years, Yami died due to a vehicular accident when she tried to follow me when I was about to ride the jeep. Now, my brother and I are caring for two dogs named Bangs and Bunny and a recently adopted kitten whom I rescued on the streets last March 3, 2022, and called her Thirdy because she was found on a Thursday night. The interview held last March 22, 2022, took place in our house in Tacloban City and lasted more or less 30 minutes. Since the informant shared with us his personal experiences of being a pet owner, this paper revolves around proving that animals, specifically our pets, are one of the best sources of love because even though we don’t understand each other, they know when to comfort us and their loyalty towards their owners is incomparable to humans. When everyone turns their back on us, they are ready to lend a paw.

            The interview started with a question on how the informant describes his relationship with his current pets; Bangs, Bunny, and Thirdy. From what I have understood, the informant describes his relationship with his pets not just merely a pet relationship but it goes beyond having a pet. He treats them as a family who constantly needs love, time, and affection. He compared having pets to a mother and child relationship wherein there are a lot of sacrifices involved to give the ideal life that his pets need. Similar to humans, having pets is highly beneficial to both the owners and the animals. According to (Trautner, 2017), pets give us a sense of responsibility that feels like we are their parents or older siblings who need to watch over them most of the time. I’ve realized that people similar to the informant have treated their pets like family because whenever they need help, their pets are always there to comfort them. Their loyalty to humans is more than just being a pet; they also do some sacrifices similar to how some of our family members sacrifice to give us the life that we need and protect us from all sorts of evil that exist in the world. The story of Kabang proves to us that pets are not just pets; they are family. A news article from CBS News written by Michelle Castillo last June 6, 2013, stated that Kabang was a family dog of Rudy Bunggal. The dog lost his upper snout, nose, and lower eyelid while trying to save Rudy’s daughter and niece. The story of Kabang indeed supports the informant's statement that pets will go beyond to show us their love, and it is something that an exceptional family member will ever do. However, every family has its own set of problems and challenges that they go through, and this is not something different when it comes to owning pets.

            Pablo B. Burgos IV, the informant, shared with us the challenges that he went through when owning pets, and the first thing that came to his mind is that the most challenging part of being a pet owner is losing them. This is one of the difficult occasions that every owner fears because losing someone significant in our life can completely change our lives for the better or the worst. The informant’s first dog Yami died when he was only ten years old, and as a child, it hurt so bad having to lose a family member. It somehow triggered him to not own pets anymore due to the accident that happened to Yami. For years, we did not have dogs thinking it would hurt Yami to see our family be with another dog. My brother always remembers Yami whenever he looks at our neighbor’s house since our neighbor was the one who gave my brother his first-ever puppy. Even though owning pets, particularly dogs, can be disastrous inside our house, every owner still makes a way to share their home and heart with their companion. Hence, it causes so much sorrow to live in a house again without them being with you. This was supported by (Ryback, 2016), since he claimed that a death of a companion animal can hurt so much as the loss of a human significant other. When losing pets, owners go through the stages of grief similar to when losing a relative or a friend. Grief can be a challenge, especially if it is prolonged and untreated. Grief has no timeline and no boundaries. Each of us has our own time to heal and move on from the pain of losing someone. Nonetheless, in the end, we still need to find ways to cope with the situation and solve these challenges. Indeed, losing someone significant is difficult, but we must go on with our lives and begin a new chapter even if they are no longer in the picture.

            Since the informant told us about the most difficult challenge of being a pet owner, I asked a follow-up question on how he manages this kind of problem, especially having experience of losing a pet. The only thing that he answered was acceptance. Definitely, it is not easy to lose a pet, a family, a friend, and a companion. However, the only thing that we need to do is to accept things that are beyond our control. Similar to what the informant had told us, “when you engage yourself in a pet relationship, you should also prepare yourself for the challenges that it will give you”. Hence, I realized that pet owners are among the bravest people since they anticipate the worst scenario and will always attempt to avoid it to extend the lives of their pets, especially because animals are known to have a short lifespan. (Ryback, 2016), stated that acceptance is the final stage of grief where there is a need to accept the loss but not necessarily forget the memories that both of you made. Sometimes, keeping the memories of your pet alive can be the healthiest way to go through grief.

            In conclusion, we do not only form relationships with humans but with animals as well. We create an incredible connection with them, especially as animals heavily depend on their humans and would always be there for them even though it means sacrificing their own life. Losing them is similar to losing a human companion and causes a significant impact on our lives as pet owners. It is a challenge that pet owners already prepare themselves for, even before thinking about owning one. However, life is a constant battle that we need to face, and challenges similar to losing a pet are something that needs to be accepted. The interview has made me realize that pet relationships give us the love we deserve. When everyone turns their back on us, they are ready to lend a paw.

2.1 COMMUNICATION MISTAKES IN A RELATIONSHIP AND CONFLICT RESOLUTION

            The Villain Inside Me

               by: Jonina Ria B. Burgos

            I feel betrayed because the more I learn,

            The more I realize I am my own villain

            I cause conflict, pain and damage not just for myself to feel

            But for others to endure as well

            I blame them for leaving me alone

            Leaving me in times when I needed them

            Forgetting that my poison is their reason not to stay

            And whenever they try to explain their side

            I emit fire, burning our bond that took years to build

            I am my own villain because the more I listen

            The more I become a great storyteller

            Twisting stories to make me the hero

            And celebrate for making me the star of the show

            I wonder why I have no friends

            Yet forgetting how my words were knives to their souls

            Using humor to cover my motive

            Laugh it off and pretend it was nothing

                My villain won’t fade and go away

                Saying she was not born but made

                Then I grasp the thought that the people I hurt

                Were the ones who shattered me first